These Thursday Blogs are more about me and where I am at, things I am learning etc.
I have written previously about my introversion and how it affects me, and more and more I am seeing how it affects my everyday being. I think it has also impacted on me and my depression.
I first learned about introversion years ago, but it wasn’t until I went to a business seminar that it was discussed and the lightbulbs just kept winking on for me. My husband always assumed I was an extrovert, because I worked in a bar and knew everyone. But that is the difference. I knew them. When I first started working there, I didn’t – and my boss was constantly telling me to smile more. I tried, and once I got to know the regulars, it wasn’t a problem to smile and laugh and joke with them.
But put me in a business situation, like marketing meetings, and I would hide in the corner and hope nobody would talk to me. Why? Because they were unfamiliar, and constantly changing, so once you got to know someone, they would up and move away and you would have to start your connections again.
Knowing I was an introvert has really made a huge difference to me and my life. Now I know that I need time out, I need breaks from those that I am constantly around, and it really helps me to reconnect with myself and come back stronger and better able to face people.
On Facebook, I discovered this wonderful Community called Introverts are Awesome. It has lovely little ideas, pictures, sayings to feed the inner introvert. It helps to be part of a group that really understand your need to have time for yourself.
I guess this really came real to me when we had a friend come and visit for my husbands birthday recently. My friend arrived with her two daughters, and another friend with his son and daughter. The house was full – we had my son and two step sons here too. By the following morning, I had to have half an hour in my bedroom because I couldn’t cope anymore.
My husband and I have recently been having some deep and meaningful’s about our core beliefs. Mine are Loyalty, (11 years in the same job, was my second job ever, and when I left, it was a 1/3 of my life at the same job), honesty and integrity (making sure all my actions are done with the purest of intentions) and respect. When I mentioned about being an introvert, suddenly things made sense to him, why I needed to have time out and quiet spells where I could withdraw into myself and refresh my being with peace and quiet.
When I have thought back over my depression, it has been hard to determine what actually caused it. I think there were lots of different factors, but one thing I am aware of, I needed more downtime to refresh my soul. I would actually have to have naps and sleep and quiet times all the time, just to renew myself and prepare myself for life. Funny how looking back on it now (hindsight is a wonderful thing) that I am able to see how my introversion was trying desperately to bring me out of my funk.
And another thought, that occurred to me, I often find my step sons invade my space. But upon reflecting on this, I think it is more to do with my introversion, I don’t get the space I need when they are around. My husband has been kind enough to take the boys off on Saturday (for sports and to visit family) because he knows that I need that space to regroup myself.
If you want to know if you are an introvert or extrovert, try this Personality Test over at HumanMetrics. It was a real eye opener for me to discover I was 89% introvert.
And a strange fact – the world is 80% introverts and 20% extroverts. Extroverts get the ideas from introverts and run with them.
Another fact – more writers tend to be introverts… Hmmm, wonder why 🙂
There is nothing wrong with being an introvert. Embrace yourself and your own path, because everyone is different.