Introversion and Me

These Thursday Blogs are more about me and where I am at, things I am learning etc.

I have written previously about my introversion and how it affects me, and more and more I am seeing how it affects my everyday being.  I think it has also impacted on me and my depression.

I first learned about introversion years ago, but it wasn’t until I went to a business seminar that it was discussed and the lightbulbs just kept winking on for me.  My husband always assumed I was an extrovert, because I worked in a bar and knew everyone.  But that is the difference.  I knew them.  When I first started working there, I didn’t – and my boss was constantly telling me to smile more.  I tried, and once I got to know the regulars, it wasn’t a problem to smile and laugh and joke with them.

But put me in a business situation, like marketing meetings, and I would hide in the corner and hope nobody would talk to me.  Why?  Because they were unfamiliar, and constantly changing, so once you got to know someone, they would up and move away and you would have to start your connections again.

Knowing I was an introvert has really made a huge difference to me and my life.  Now I know that I need time out, I need breaks from those that I am constantly around, and it really helps me to reconnect with myself and come back stronger and better able to face people.

On Facebook, I discovered this wonderful Community called Introverts are Awesome.  It has lovely little ideas, pictures, sayings to feed the inner introvert.  It helps to be part of a group that really understand your need to have time for yourself.

I guess this really came real to me when we had a friend come and visit for my  husbands birthday recently.  My friend arrived with her two daughters, and another friend with his son and daughter.  The house was full – we had my son and two step sons here too.  By the following morning, I had to have half an hour in my bedroom because I couldn’t cope anymore.

My husband and I have recently been having some deep and meaningful’s about our core beliefs.  Mine are Loyalty, (11 years in the same job, was my second job ever, and when I left, it was a 1/3 of my life at the same job), honesty and integrity (making sure all my actions are done with the purest of intentions) and respect.  When I mentioned about being an introvert, suddenly things made sense to him, why I needed to have time out and quiet spells where I could withdraw into myself and refresh my being with peace and quiet.

When I have thought back over my depression, it has been hard to determine what actually caused it.  I think there were lots of different factors, but one thing I am aware of, I needed more downtime to refresh my soul.  I would actually have to have naps and sleep and quiet times all the time, just to renew myself and prepare myself for life.  Funny how looking back on it now (hindsight is a wonderful thing) that I am able to see how my introversion was trying desperately to bring me out of my funk.

And another thought, that occurred to me, I often find my step sons invade my space.  But upon reflecting on this, I think it is more to do with my introversion, I don’t get the space I need when they are around.  My husband has been kind enough to take the boys off on Saturday (for sports and to visit family) because he knows that I need that space to regroup myself.

If you want to know if you are an introvert or extrovert, try this Personality Test over at HumanMetrics.  It was a real eye opener for me to discover I was 89% introvert.

And a strange fact – the world is 80% introverts and 20% extroverts.  Extroverts get the ideas from introverts and run with them.

Another fact – more writers tend to be introverts… Hmmm, wonder why  🙂

There is nothing wrong with being an introvert.  Embrace yourself and your own path, because everyone is different.


KiwiWriters Blogging Week – Day 6

Today is Friday, generally a day I try and make for myself, but this week I have work.  That is fine – money is good!

So, on a Friday, I try and get out to a local cafe and sit in the tranquil surroundings with my laptop and just dwell.  If I write, edit, or just soak up the atmosphere, that is OK with me.  With views like this, how could anyone not feel inspired!

Hidden Cafe, Motueka Valley Highway, NZ


Hidden Cafe, Motueka Valley Highway, NZ


Hidden Cafe, Motueka Valley Highway, NZ


This is my Chillaxing place, somewhere I can go, unwind and get ready for the weekend, knowing that I have refreshed myself and feeling happy.

A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words – Sandy’s Story

My Mum sent through an email over the weekend, having been inspired by the picture.  I asked if it was ok to put her story here, and she agreed!  So here it is – Sandy’s Story (350 words)

As she stood on the shore and looked out on the crashing sea coming into the bay, she now had the peace deep within her soul that she had craved for all her life.  The crashing waves and tumultuous water crashing around was what her life had felt like for many years and memories at times could be still quite vivid of a past life.   But that closed book on the past could be opened now and she could look at the memories without shuddering and that in itself was healing to remember back and sometimes asking why and at other times accepting that that was how it was.

The surf continued to roll in the Bay but she could see that the waves were starting to ease a little and she reflected that life is like that as we move forward to a better more positive and peaceful place.  It took a long time to walk through the storms of life and at times there seemed to be too many of them to endure it all and it would have been so easy to succumb to ‘strong wind’, ‘thrashing waves’ and the ‘confused seas’ of life’s events.  The first glimmer of  a lightening sky and an easing over a period of time of the ‘storm’ we can begin to feel hope again, just need to be still a little while longer and the clouds clear, the wind drops, the confused sea is starting to gradually loose its intensity.

Again in life the storms pass and we gain strength, healing begins and the peace invades our souls as we release all that has gone before and start building for the future in a far more positive way with the knowledge we have gained.

The waves continue to crash into the Bay but the storm does not hold the fears and pain that it once did and she can enjoy watching the waves as they appear to run into one another and she can feel wind and spray on her face, then she slowly turns and walks back to the new life she has created for herself.